I’m pretty sure that emperor’s naked







The Humanities Dept. is really just one big nudist colony; small mercy being that they’re a sedentary breed, generally found/not found tucked away in a corner behind a big pile of books and a bigger pair of glasses. I usually wear clothes, but the other day, for the purpose of survival (and participation points), I went completely starkers.

We were given a picture of beachgoers from different eras; one from the fifties, and the other from the eighties and told to do a comparative reading of the two. I couldn’t come up with anything that wasn’t really stretching it, so I just sat there wondering whether the homing pigeons that took photos of Germany in WW2 had been awarded purple hearts. 

It went it’s-your-turn silent just before I figured it out, and since there was still nothing mildly feasible to add, I said that the photo (which cut off one of the women at the head) was a kind of mental castration; a tacit reinforcement of the patriarchal objectification of women and the privileging of the female body over the female mind. I felt like a tool because the photo had clearly just been cropped but I had no alternatives since the only contribution I’d had at this point was doodling flowers round the edge of my page, and fighting back the urge to draw a moustache on one of the women.

It was scary how bad my piffle was; scarier still that it elicited several low rumblings of assent. This is the way things roll in the Humanities, and although some of the stuff is credible, a lot of it is rubbish. I think the reason I don’t actually out the emperor is that it might expose my own nuddiness, which, I can tell you now, would clear out that classroom quicker than the notion of objective truth.

Check out this piece. It’s a little long but it’s a great use of five minutes: the philosopher.txt I’m considering walking round uni with a big copy of it pinned to my front and back. At the very least it’ll provide some warmth in the colder months.


7 thoughts on “I’m pretty sure that emperor’s naked

  1. I swear I used to do the exact same thing, cobbling together the facade of a coherent argument basd on buzz words and conjecture.

    Then I used to have fun pulling apart others that did the same thing but with an air of smugness suggesting that they actually thought that they were knowledgable on the subject.

    Man, I think I actually miss Uni…

  2. are you at Curtin uni? That’s a lot of concrete.. you are going to need a bit more than a couple of A4 Max Dupain photocopies to keep you warm during winter…. I suggest a full Bill Henson body stocking

  3. Hey Megs

    Love the blog. I saw a link on facebook and have just spent the last hour chuckling to myself while reading your insights.


    • Thanks Dave! Hey, huge congratulations on the new arrival. I Saw her on Friday at Lu’s wedding – she’s BEAUTIFUL!! Trying to organise catchup with valjean, so hopefully see you soon!

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